In an effort to lure potential customers to their showrooms, most car companies offer an extensive array of optional extras to go along with your spanking new automobile. These include everything that the carmaker has at their disposal and are willing to do to the vehicle (keeping various regulations and warranty clauses in mind), which satisfies most buyers.
Enough extras and modification kits to satisfy most people, this one is at a Maruti dealership.
However, some individuals have gone that extra mile, making it impossible for even the cars’ very creators, to be unable to recognise them. These artistically-challenged prodigies, have come up with some truly unique, yet grotesque creations.
1. “I like the colour of baby excrement and I don’t mind a bad ride quality.”
This guy has no real sense of colours and his style palate seems to be predominated by the urge to ruin a classy German design. After all, he painted the bottom-half of his VW Phaeton in this shade of colour. And, do you notice the “GHA” in the number-plate? Well, that stands for ghastly. The person behind this terrible paint job, also ruined the ride comfort of this saloon, by putting those massive alloy wheels. These wheels wouldn’t be out of place if fitted to a medium-sized lorry, let alone a saloon car like this. Not only do these wheels look terrible, they also do terrible things to the car’s excellent ride quality.
The standard VW Phaeton won’t grab eyeballs, but won’t hurt them, either.
Talking about hurting eyeballs and bad paint jobs…
2. “I’m a glamour model and I love my Range Rover. So what if it’s pink and hideous.”
This particular 2011 Range Rover belonged to the British glamour model, Katie Price. The SUV has a custom number-plate, a £25,000 diamond-encrusted clock, aluminium pedals, aluminium exhaust pipes and special quilted leather upholstery. But none of that is gonna do any favour for the sheer horror, that is the pink colour of the thing. The Pink Rover was initially put up for £100,000 on Twitter, great place to sell a car. But after several months of nothing, the model seemed to have realised that no one was falling for that. So now, it is supposedly up for grabs on ebay for £60,000. However, we reckon that even the most hardened fan won’t buy this hideous SUV, even if it hasn’t been run much. Poor Rangey.
We think that this white Range Rover would fair better on the used car market.
It is amazing to think that a perfectly good and capable car, can be ruined by someone’s idiotic decision on the paint job. Apparently, there’s more than one way to ruin your premium SUV.
3. “I magnetised my Porsche and then drove through a scrapyard.”
The Porsche Cayenne is one of the best SUVs if you want the perfect blend of on-road performance, impeccable engineering and superb off-roading capabilities. However, this guy surely thinks he can do better than Porsche, themselves. We have no idea why he committed this atrocity and if he is someone you would have brunch with, but we are certain that he doesn’t like his car, much.
Yes, it’s equally horrendous from the rear.
If someone likes this particular Cayenne, they certainly have a nut or two loose in their head and need to go to a doctor, quick.
It isn’t that bad, is it? Unless you magnetise it, of course.
If you think this guy has lost it, take a look at what we think, to be the tallest riding SUV. Also, the stupidest. This, for sure, is in America.
4. “I kept growing and growing and now, I can’t even turn without tipping over.”
High ground clearance and a commanding driving position, has long been two of the SUVs’ best allies. This guy, though, took those allies to a new height, quite literally. This guy took the term “looking down upon others” in the literal sense and jacked up his Chevy. Unfortunately, he doesn’t seem to be very bright. Why? Because this Suburban has a body-on-frame design, and this noob, lifted almost the entire thing, except for the axles and the suspension bits. They remain at the exact same level as on the standard vehicle. This means, that although he can now look down upon other motorists, he might tip over if he isn’t very careful around the bends. That is courtesy to this modified Suburban’s high centre of gravity.
The standard Suburban is tall, enough. Of course, unless you’re too stupid.
Now, continuing with the SUV theme, let’s look at the other extreme. What if you want an SUV body, but dislike its tall driving position? Well, this guy seems to have the answer to that problem. Or does he?
5. “Honey, I shrunk the Jeep! Oh, we can’t go shopping in it, anymore.”
For most SUV buyers, the vehicle’s commanding driving position and excellent ground clearance are one of the biggest fortes behind their purchase. However, this individual decided that he wouldn’t be bothered by that pesky high perch of his Jeep Cherokee and lowered the thing so much so, that it now kisses the road as it drives along. This is a modification that is so stupid, that even the late Dodo bird would be left embarrassed. People lower the ride height of their cars all the time, but not to this extent. This, once proud and capable SUV, can now be stopped in its tracks by a small stone! Forget going over speed breakers, this thing wouldn’t even be able to move with a full load of people on-board. In fact, we are pretty sure that this Jeep isn’t road legal, anymore. Also, one might crook his/her back, trying to get inside this Cher-low-kee.
A bog-standard Cherokee is fully capable of clearing speed breakers and looks alright.
We now move from American SUVs to German luxury saloons. Also, if you think your car’s 20-inch rims are big, you are in the wrong neck of the woods. Want proof? Cool, but you probably won’t like it.
Well, you asked for proof. And yes, that’s a BMW 7-Series saloon.